Dil Bole Hadippaa! is another Yash Raj crappy movie. If you are not in high school (or below) and love your reasoning ability you shouldn’t like it. The movie is based on day dreams and fantasies of a fourteen year old.
Remember you were fourteen dreamt about being Chinese figure skating couple (with girl of third bench in your class) after watching it in ESPN? or dreamt about being Spanish Matador after watching it in a news channel? or being secret agent for RAW India and air dropped into Rawalpindi Pakiland for an assignment only you are capable of doing, fantasised after watching a crappy 007 bond movie? It’s same here in Dil Bole Hadippa. Scriptwriter was in a mindset of a high school kid and he just watched a Cricket match!!!
If you were to fantasise a cricket match …..
- Match will have to be won, and it should not be an easy win. It will be a “Last Ball, Last wicket, four runs” win
- Match will have to be won and more importantly won against political or traditional rivals. Also, it has to be a revenge win… 10 year old revenge.
- Opposite team will have 11 all-rounder world class players? Your team will have only you and your captain can play cricket. Rest of them are good for nothing. Still you win 🙂
- On the process of winning your vital bone will be fractured, your hand. You will still play to win the match. (If it were foot ball your leg will be fractured and if you are a ballet dancer your ankle….& so on).
- At one point of the time you will have to hit six sixes.
- You will have the ability to score big runs as right and also left handed batsman 🙂
Unfortunately all these fantasies are true in this movie; they are incorporated as it is; giving you the ability to predict every scene in the movie.
Other Masalas….
- Masala #1 Songs: Packed with bad songs. Not single one of them is worth remembering again. This movie is targeted for NRIs around the worlds and specifically Punjabis, so each song is bhangra, with loads of colours and stuff. Exactly. I have never been to Punjab, but I am curious to learn if they dance all the time there as shown in this movie?
- Masala#2 Re-unions: There are many reunions in this movie, and enough amount sentiments associate with it. First, the father reunites with son, after 10 years resulting in son giving up his career for his father’s silly ambitions. Mother reunites with father for no reason at all!!
- Masala #3 Item girls: There are two of them in the movie, unnecessarily wearing less than necessary clothing.
- Masala #4 Realization: Gender Equality, Social Equality, Cricket ethics, work ethics… and other topic attended at philosophical level shot at each other and rest of the world making them realise that they were totally wrong. It is presented such a way that before release of this movie there were none of the above listed ideas practiced in our society.
- Masala #5 Disguise: Biggest mistake!!! Everyone in the audience (including any retarded ones, if any) can see Rani is in disguise as a man, but no character in the movie could figure that out. For whole length of the movie Rani hides behind thin beard and a turban. Not a soul, including her teammates, captain, spectators, Pakistani visa department, border security and the even the doctor had a teeny tiny doubt!!!
But Shahid could finally find out it’s actually a babe, not a guy and do you know how? Her freaking left contact lenses falls off!!!! What a genius!!!
Lessons learnt: Yash Raj movies suck, always !
The Bach 